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atachement: physical, emotional
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orientation
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affair analogy
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orbit & gravity analogy
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hostility, mocking parents
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Melanie's father felt used, abused, taken for granted, and taken advantage of. Actually, all parents are used, abused, taken for granted, and taken advantage of. The reason it usually doesn't get to us is again the work of attachment. Take for example a mother cat with nursing kittens. The mother is walked on, bitten, scratched, pushed and prodded, but for most part, remains remarkably tollerant. But should a kitten that is not hers be introduced to the litter, that tolerance will be sorely lacking, unless an attachment forms.
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attachment drives the child toward being "good" for the parent
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values are interalized in adolescences
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before that, child's innate goodness is a reflection of parent's value
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peer orientation corrupts moral development